I went into the local WalMart to purchase some fuel additive for my ’89 Dodge Raider….. With 180k on the odometer it sometimes gets in these sluggish moods…. The check-out lady asked me if I was at least 18 years of age in order to purchase the product…. I replied, rather snippy, “Lady, my car is old enough to buy this”…. As a matter of fact, the old Raider is now 21 – legal drinking age…. I think I’ll start giving it a shot of Vodka every once in a while….. Might work better than the manufactured stuff…. I wonder if I could convince a cop to arrest the Raider for drunk driving instead of me if the situation ever came up?….

It’s long lost history concerning the Seattle Sonics ending up being the Oklahoma City Thunder, but, here’s the latest rumor from the sports section. OKC’s arena football team, the Yard Dawgz, is rumored to be headed to Seattle….. OKC officials claim it’s not true…. We’ve all heard that one before….. If this comes down, I’m not sure who is getting the short-end of the stick as I’ve never personally attended a Thunder or Dawgz game….

We had a runoff election yesterday between two Republican candidates…. Candidate #1, a Mr. Calvey, had been in the political circus for 14 years, elected 6 times, and expected to win the primary election a few weeks back with no problem….. Problem – Candidate #2, a Mr. Langsford, had never run for any political office before, but, he managed to get enough votes to force the runoff election held yesterday…..

Shortly after the Primaries, Mr. Calvey, who was definitely peeved over the situation, went ballistic and started a series of mud slinging you would not believe, including fake polling calls that berated Mr. Langsford (Of course, he denied having anything to do with it), and an extensive TV commercial barrage of how he was much more qualified, etc…..

His biggest mistake was agreeing to a televised debate….. It was something to see – It was the Bully against the Nice Guy….. Calvey kept getting louder and more boisterous, making all kinds of accusations against Langsford as to his qualifications for the seat, including some remarks about his mother and family….. Mr. Langsford kept his cool, and, in a calm voice, more than proved his qualifications and his ability to deal with loudmouths…..

Well, I’m happy to say, Langsford prevailed with a 65% to 35% win! Restored my faith in Oklahoma voters, and, maybe, just maybe, voters nationwide will take the time to research the candidates they vote for and we can save this nation from itself….. What a concept!…..

Just how low can our IQ’s go?….. Saw this one on the news a couple of weeks back…… Men who want to attract women need to wear “Red”…. Apparently, the color Red strikes a woman’s fancy, as opposed to the normal subdued browns and blacks worn by males….. I guess it has the opposite effect on women as it does on Bulls…. A “REVELATION”! – Maybe it does effect Bulls the same way – They just want to get close and intimate with the Bullfighter!….. That’s what you call “Rough Foreplay” – Ouch!…..

I dismissed this UNTIL I started noticing an abnormal amount of POLITICIANS on TV wearing, you guessed it, RED TIES….. Known as the “Red Power Tie”….. The person I’ve seen most often wearing the glaring Red stripe is none other than Mr. Obama….. Those Politicians don’t miss a trick…… I wonder if they have palm readers and soothsayers on the payrolls too?….. PLEASE, PLEASE, vote these career self-servers OUT of office…..

Today’s THAT day to run and hide, get out those good luck charms – STAY AT HOME…… Yeah, Friday the 13th does have a lot of history behind it, mostly based on religious events of evil and deviltry, hence the supposed Bad Luck associated with it…… Since my Luck usually runs backwards, I’ve had a fairly decent day so far – Did some mechanic work without hitting myself in the head with the socket wrench – Practiced my Guitar without breaking any strings or fingers – And, I plan to attend a Birthday party tonight at a local Pub (Uh-Ho, that could turn bad – Na-ah!)…..

PD Bob, on the other hand, has fifteen (15) Rabbit Foots (or is it Feets) around his neck, along with Garlic Cloves, and is hiding in the most secure part of MR Central watching all the Friday the 13th movies….. He’s begging for refills on popcorn and coke as I Post this since he is too scared to get them himself…… That did it – He’s cussing me in Prairie Dog-ese now….. Gotta go – He’s throwing the “Feets” at me…..

I don’t watch much TV, usually just catch the news and weather early in the morning…… Just before the primaries a few weeks ago, I noticed these commercials popping up in groups of two during the broadcast….. They start off with a person introducing themselves – I’m so-and-so and I’m an housewife, sculptor, ex-druggie, etc….. I’ve seen about 12 different ones…. The 30 second commercial continues with I do this/that – basically I’m normal person looking for the same things everyone else is looking for in life…. The spot ends with, “I’m so-and-so and I’m a Mormon”….. Then a medium font scrolls across the screen with their name and the web address – Mormon.org…..

Are the Mormons recruiting or just trying to convince people that their religion is made up of normal, everyday, God fearing people and are not to be confused with, say like, Muslims?….. I mean, they both start with an “M” – Do they think people would confuse the two and take them for the radical one, although, the Mormons have some radical ideas, just not as violent…. I have to admit I don’t know that much about either and God told me to stay out of it…. He said I would not be an asset to either one….. I’m still thinking on that one (Will I be smoking a Turd in Hell? (Robin Williams))…. Any Comments or Commandments?

….From “My Generation”…… Big names from the past are still at it, and, after listening to some of these new albums, they are still on the top of their game….. Here’s a few of the new ones I’ve been exposed to: Steve Miller Band – Bingo!, J.J. Cale with Eric Clapton – The Road to Escondido, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers – Mojo, and even Devo – Something for Everybody, along with the new one from Jimi Hendrix – Valleys of Neptune, released 40 years after his demise…..

I’m hoping we have up and coming young talent to replace these masters when they retire….. I don’t listen to too much new stuff, but, through a fellow band member, I got to hear an amazing Oklahoma talent (even got an autographed CD): Ali Harter – Worry the Bone….. It’s based in the Blues….. Check her CD out if you get the chance….. She has a national following….. “Never too old to Rock ‘n’ Roll”…….

Senators McClain (Arizona) and Coburn (Oklahoma) claim that Two (2) Billion dollars of the stimulus money has, or will be spent, for over One Hundred (100) useless and unnecessary projects….. The administration rebutted by stating that some of these projects were already on the books, and, anyway, the amount is only a small faction of 1% of the total stimulus package….. WELL, if that’s the way they look at it, and it’s such a SMALL AMOUNT, why don’t they give ME the Two (2) Billion….. I think I, my family, friends, relatives, and even neighbors and strangers I meet on the street could live the good life right on out to the end, which probably won’t be too long the way things are going…..

Here’s a couple of the projects: $70,000 to study the effect of cocaine on Monkeys (Yeah, I doubt the Monkeys will see much of the coke)….. $500,000 to replace the windows in the Mount St. Helens Visitor Center….. The only problem is that the Center has been closed for some time and is scheduled to remain closed for an indefinite amount of time….. Anyone know when they closed it?…. I think it was 2003 the last time I visited the Volcano and it was open then…. Got lots of cool pictures from in and around the Center….. If they’re not going to re-open it, why replace the windows?….. Augh!!!….

Just remember, your Government is working for you, just ask Big Business, and, Why don’t you grab up some of that beautiful, well oiled Beach front property for sell on the Gulf Coast…..

OK, what’s going on up there in the Great Northwest…… eh?….. I just saw on the news that you’ve got eight (8) separate wildfires going along with enough rain to cause mudslides afterwards….. I guess you can have your home burned down and mud slid away in the same day…… Not Good!…..

If you North by Northwesterners expect me to move up there (or even visit), you’ve got to do something about this!….. Pray to the Fire and Rain God – Something! – Anything!…… I mean I’m getting broiled and baked like a potato here in Oklahoma right now and our weather over the last six (6) months has rated a 9.5 on the Weird Weather-O-Meter…..

So-o-o, PLEASE correct this ASAP or I’ll just have to go the other way – Move to New Orleans and play in the giant oil slick…..

Hollywood comes to Oklahoma, again….. There’s been lots of parts of movies, and, even complete movies like “Twister” made in Oklahoma, but, I don’t know if they’re on the right track with this one or not…… They’re already here and filming in Pauls Valley, a small town on I-35 south of Oklahoma City….. The movie is supposed to have a plot based on a young girl trying to get out of a small country town, but, it is based around the Oklahoma cult sport of “Noodling” or more commonly known as “Okie Noodling”….. Anon knows what I’m talking about….. It’s not the smartest sport in the World, believe me…..

Here’s all you got to do: Find a creek, stream, or river, usually muddy and with lots of nooks and crannies along it’s banks, usually covered with tree growth and underbrush…… These are basically small underwater caves cut in the banks just under the surface by the water flow….. Huge Catfish (40 to 70 lbs. or more) love to hang out in them, along with who knows what….. Then, just JUMP IN! – stick your arm in the hole, locate the catfish, STICK YOUR HAND AND ARM DOWN IT’S THROAT, wrestle it out of the water, and throw it in a boat – That’s it – Nothing to it….. No fishing poles, lines, bait or gear of any kind required! (including brains)…..

PBS has already done a special on “Okie Noodling” a few years back….. Just can’t wait for this one to make the theaters….. I’m sure Oklahoma will be honored with at least a few pages in “The Great Redneck History of the U. S. of A.”…… Yee-Ha!……

Anyone out there been lucky enough to have seen our Super-Tech Jek lately?…… I can’t catch-up with him……

First, he’s in Seattle, then I hear he’s in Ft. Worth – Then Houston – Then Seattle!….. Now I hear that he’s in Venice, Italy – Soon to be headed for Munich, Germany….. Has our Super-Tech turned into an International Playboy or what?……

Must be nice – How do you get a job like that?….. Send me an application – PLEASE……

Next Tuesday (27JUL10), in Oklahoma, we are having a major election of local and state offices, including primaries for Governor and Congressional seats in D.C. (the ultimate playboy place for any politician)…..  I assume most or all of the other states of this U. S. of A. are conducting the same….

I’m not here to tell you who to vote for, but, I strongly urge you to peruse the candidates closely, and, vote your convictions….. The state our country is in at the present time needs some revision (at the minimum), or a complete overhaul (at the max)….. I’m leaning toward the complete overhaul, but, that’s just me…..

REMEMBER! – IF YOU DON’T EXERCISE YOUR RIGHT TO VOTE, THEN, IN MY OPINION, YOU LOSE YOUR RIGHT TO BITCH!….

S-o-o-o, MR Community-ites – Get to those Polls and do your duty and VOTE!…. (The preceding has been a public awareness message, or, a command from your Fearless Leader – your choice – Thank you…..)

……Free Sauna – just step outside…… The heat index in OKC yesterday was 111 degrees – Actual temp was 96 degrees…. The seven day forecast is for more of the same – high 90′s to triple digits (shade temp) – 105 to 115 degrees (Heat Index)…… This is due to all the excessive rain we had a couple of weeks ago…… Actually, it’s been over six (6) months of record breaking/record tying weather events here in the Great (?) Plains…..

First, we have the worst blizzard on record (14.1″ snow) Christmas Eve, then a record tying Ice Storm in January along with record low temps going into February, then, snap your fingers, and we are 10 to 20 degrees above normal temps in March and April with no precipitation – Instant change from Winter to Summer…… In May we have two (2) large tornado breakouts, both along the same track – What the first one missed, the second one finished off….. In June, we had the worst hail storm I have ever seen….. Image baseball-sized hail stones hitting everything in sight Horizontally!!! The winds were in the 60-80 mph range….. Other than this Hail event we were dry as popcorn, UNTIL, Late June, in which we had our entire Spring in one day – Eleven (11) inches of rain in less than Five (5) hours – Record breaking and flooding where it has never flooded before….. No, it didn’t stop there, over the next two weeks we had two (2) more flooding events…… We’re like 10-15 inches above normal on rainfall now, AND THEN, two days ago, the Sun came out with a vengeance, and it’s instant Steam Bath time with all the moisture in the ground….. I predict the sky will fall this Fall (if we have a Fall)….. Chicken Little was right……

Of course, we’re not having any Global Climate changes, N-a-a-a-a, that’s just something those Green Peace nuts thought up….. Maybe people should wake up and smell the STEAM – It’s not nice to fool with Mother Nature….. Tell that to your Congressman……

Time to enjoy what few liberties and rights we have left…… They’re being taken away faster than I can count (maybe it’s not that fast then…eh?)…… Anyways, a couple of 4th of July pointers:

1. Don’t blow thy self up or apart…..

AND,

2. Don’t blow-up anybody you don’t intend to blow-up……

Happy 4th of July to everyone!!!!!….

Note: This Post is broadcast in English only……

I know every one out there has spent at least a little time thinking up ways to stop the oil. So Lets hear the ideas. I don’t care if they are crazy, zany, or brilliant. This is just us venting after all.

Here are two ideas to get things started:

1. Why don’t they stick a high tech plug in the hole. They could use a drill stem stinger to start with and then have a cone shaped plug with O-ring seals etc. All they have to do is stuff it into the pipe and no more leak.
OR
2. Why don’t they drop a really big rock on it. All they have to do is de-orbit a meteor at the right time and wham no more leak.